When I saw the episode of Insecure when Molly asked, "You got my sunscreen? I know I'm black, but cancer don't care". I knew I needed to write a post about the importance of sunscreen. As a black woman, you might question whether you should use an SPF on a daily basis. You may even believe that you can't get skin cancer. But you’d be surprised. "Anyone can get skin cancer," says, Jeanine B. Downie MD, director of Image Dermatology. While It is less common in people of color, it’s often more severe. That's because it's usually found later when it's harder to treat.

I admit until I was in my 30s, I like most black people were unaware of the damage caused by the sun. I used baby oil to sunbathe so I could get a deep chocolate tan. The first person to tell me how harmful that was, was Doctor Downie. She advised me to wear a sunscreen every day rain or shine, in winter and summer. Thankfully, the damage I caused to my skin did not have a fatal result. But let me be clear, our melanin will not protect us against sunburn or melasma.

Now, I know most of us still believe that "black don't crack," but it does age, and 70% of all aging is caused by the sun. Unlike hair, after it is damaged, you can't cut it all off and start again. So here are a few tips to take care of your skin and maybe save your life.

Sunscreen Fit Tips: (According to the Skin Cancer Foundation)
1. Use sunscreen daily, and throughout the year. Remember, sun exposure happens year round – whether summer or winter – so at the very least it’s wise to use a facial moisturizer with sunscreen when you’re going about your regular day to day.

2. Use sunscreens that provide “broad-spectrum protection.” Board spectrum protection is something that will be advertised on the product label, and this means that the sunscreen will protect against both UVA and UVB rays – which are linked to skin cancer and sunburn, respectively.

3. In cases of minimal sun exposure (i.e., sun exposure for just a few minutes at a time) it’s safe to stick with an SPF (sun protection factor) of 15, which will filter out about 93 percent of UV radiation. In cases of more extended, intense sun exposure, you should go with SPF 30 or higher.

4. Last but not least, when applying sunscreen keep in mind that you need to use an adequate amount and you may also need to reapply depending on how long you’re outdoors. The basic rule of thumb: You should reapply sunscreen every 2-3 hours, and if you go swimming or get in the water, you should also reapply more sunscreen after exiting the water.
 

 

It wasn't until I was in my 20's before I felt entirely comfortable in my skin. As a child, I hated my untamed curly hair, freckled face and I am ashamed to admit it, but I also disliked my brown skin. As a kid growing up in New Jersey, I spent countless hours playing outside and swimming in our pool. So much so that my Grandmother told me that I wasn't allowed to go back into the pool because I was black enough. That was the first time, but unfortunately not the last time I would experience the "brown paper bag" syndrome (more on that in a later blog-post). My Grandmother, like many people in her generation, believed that anyone darker than a brown paper bag would not be accepted. So during the summer, when I would turn 50 shades of black, my Grandmother unknowing placed shame on that blackness.

This was much bigger than my Grandmother, the assault on black beauty began from the time we were slaves. During my journey of self-awareness, I read tons of books and articles trying to pinpoint why this is so prevalent in our community. One of the studies done by psychologists Kenneth B. Clark and Mamie K. Phipps Clark in the 1930s, The Doll Test in which they asked children to describe various dolls. Black children across America consistently, though not entirely, identified Black and brown dolls as ugly, while describing white ones as “pretty,” “clean,” and “nice.” I asked myself, how can a community that influences global culture, disliked themselves so much. 

The more I became aware of how amazing, powerful, beautiful black people are; I started to love everything about me, I also realized the best part of me wasn't about how I looked at all, instead what I had to offer to the world. This was the genesis of my life's purpose. I began to make it my mission to stand up against self-hate in our culture and the ridiculous notion that hair texture/length, skin color, dress size are currencies more valuable than cash.

I first started with my family and friends, helping them to stop using phrases like "Good Hair and Fair Skin." Think about it, if having light skin makes you "fair" than what is brown/dark skin "unfair"? Then before going to Graduate School, I would conduct workshops on self-worth for high-school girls to show them the greatness of black people and how to place value on their unique beauty both inside and out.

So It is no accident, that On October 23rd, 2018 on my birthday I might add, I will be launching my beauty company! I was tired of black women being portrayed as not as beautiful, smart and undervalued in comparison to those of other women and I was fed up with the beauty industry for ignoring our value. Did you know that Black women, spend an estimated $7.5 billion annually on beauty products, shelling out 80% more on cosmetics and twice as much on skin care as their non-Black counterparts? Yet, we are grossly underserved by the cosmetics industry. Well, we are going to change that!

The Good Beaute mission: We are the first beauty company in business to serve you, our community and the world. The driving force behind our mission is to make Black Women our priority, to donate $1.00 for every product sold to a non-profit that supports young black women and to create the "It is beautiful to be good" movement inspiring black women to cultivate a healthy, happy, good life.

 

I have worked in Corporate America for almost 20 years from major corporations like Coca-Cola to a Private Equity owned small company like DRM-JPC Brands. By all accounts, I have made it. I am a Chief Marketing Officer with a 6 figure income, I have traveled all over the world and worked on some of the most recognized and used brands. But on January 1, 2013, when most people were making a resolution to lose weight, stop smoking or stop shopping. My resolution was far more dramatic! I RESOLVED to expose and fight against the uncomfortable truth that there is a high level of discrimination and disrespectful treatment that exists in Corporate America. This treatment is not from the usual suspects but in fact, came from Women and even more painfully disturbing some of them were Black Women. Now let me be clear! I have been blessed with having several amazing professional mentors who were Women and Black, and without them, I would not be where I am today. But they, unfortunately, were the exception, not the norm. So when I heard the quote from Madeleine Albright "There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women." I had comfort in knowing that many of my past managers and some co-workers would be there together gasping for air. All too common

After speaking with several women, I realized my experience was not all that unique. In fact, many of the women that I spoke with had very similar experience and felt their biggest roadblocks came from the very people that they assumed would provide guidance and support. Now one may say, we should not automatically expect support from other women. That may be true but what we should expect is not to be mistreated by them.  I was disappointed to discover that in 2016, there are only 32 female CEOs in the Fortune 500 meaning that only 6.4% of the U.S.'s companies are run by women. Even more disturbing women are working full time in the United States typically are still paid just 80 percent of what men are paid. So why is it necessary to supports other women? We can't afford not to.

How To Close The Gender Gap:

1. Become a mentor for at least one junior executive at your company. FACTS: Sponsorship makes women more likely to aim high. Women with sponsors are 8 percent more likely to ask for both a stretch assignment and a pay increase than women without sponsors.

2. Celebrate the success of other women in your industry. <strong>Facts: In a performance evaluation study, men who stayed late to help prepare for a meeting were rated 14 percent more favorably than women who did the exact same thing. When both men and women failed to help, the women were penalized with a 12 percent lower rating than the men.

3. Actively seek and recruit qualified women into your organization. FACTS: Men will apply for jobs when they meet 60 percent of the hiring criteria, while women wait until they meet 100 percent.

4. Evaluate Men and Women Fairly. FACTS: Gender-blind studies consistently show that removing gender from decisions improves women’s chances of success. One study found that replacing a woman’s name with a man’s name on a résumé improved the odds of getting hired by 61 percent.

5. Support working mothers. Facts A recent study found that a job applicant with “PTA coordinator” on her resume was 79% less likely to be recommended for hire compared to an equally qualified woman without children.


Kindness is a choice! Doing good for others builds a stronger society, community, family and you!

For the past eighteen months, I have been consulting for companies like Goldman Sachs defining a playbook for the Global Beauty Market, a start-up wellness company creating their social media strategy, and The YMCA driving a long-term strategic digital brand and marketing plan.

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Dear Monday, How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

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Almost 20 years ago I had my first "Mean Girl"adult encounter, and it left me wondering if I had somehow landed on one of those hidden camera shows and being punked by Ashton Kutcher. But to my dismay, this was real life! It was my first day working for one of the largest beauty companies in the world, and I was ready.  A month before my first day I had planned out how to make an impact in the first 90 days. To start, I  read their annual reports, conducted store checks and spoke to consumers about their beauty needs and I even tried several of the company's products myself to gain first-hand insight something I had learned to do from my days as a Brand Manager on Diet Coke. I arrived at 8:00 am in my power DVF dress, Christian Louboutin classic pumps and carrying a Chanel tote. Not only was I prepared to slay intellectually, but also, I was bringing a strong fashion game.  After completing my official paperwork, my HR rep escorted me to my floor to meet my new manager and other team members. There she was, standing by my cube with a pleasant smile that felt very familiar; she informed me that we could grab lunch and get to know one another. I was so excited, here was an attractive, smart black woman that I was eager to learn from.  My excitement was short lived, during lunch, before the bread arrived at the table, she informed me that she was not going to be my friend and she was not impressed with my MBA or my Coca-Cola training. She mentioned her disappointment in not having any input into me getting the role so she would fire me if I didn't perform. I was thankful when the waiter arrived to take our order because it gave her chance to pause from her rant and me the opportunity to compose myself from this verbal thrashing.  Many things went through my head from giving her one of my grandmother's famous sweet yet deadly cuss outs or remain calm with the hope that the episode would be over soon. I chose the ladder.  The next 30 minutes was similar to the first 10 minutes but worse.  At some point, I just started praying. I knew that I needed to revise my game plan because she was my boss and I wanted to keep my job.  Now I just needed to figure out a way to win her over. Put on your big girl panties! The next six months felt like I was training for a marathon that I would never get to run. But what I know now is that God was ONLY preparing me for the roles to come in the future and that one day I would have the opportunity to impart my knowledge to help provide useful tools to empower women to navigate successfully with other women in Corporate America.  Here are three tips that helped me survive.

1. Don't take it personally. Most women that mistreat other people are dealing with tons of insecurities. After months of trying to figure out why my new manager disliked me and took pleasure in making my work life miserable, I started to realize that she was dealing with the personal pain of her own. I still didn't excuse her behavior, but I developed compassion for her and made a drastic shift change. I was no longer trying to prove to her how smart I was but instead, appreciate how smart she was. I also made it my business to make her look good at all cost. This was not easy BUT NESSERARY.
2. Develop core alliances. I started to identify areas that I could leverage my expertise to gain visibilities outside of my core team. Now, this could backfire because you need to make sure you can do your current job and any new project at the highest level. This allowed me to gain several supporters throughout the organization. It is tough for your manager to speak negatively about you when she hears praises from her peer group.
3. Don't gossip.  When someone does you wrong, your instinct is to tell anyone who will listen- BUT DON'T! I realized several years after I had left the company. During my first six months to a year, I spent far too much time talking about my manager to my co-workers swapping horror stories. In fact, I received satisfaction in knowing that I wasn't alone. But this only damaged our business progress. What I realize now you are only as strong as your weakest performer, and you can't beat your competitors if you are too busy fighting one another.

"Your life does not get better by chance; it gets better by change!" Jim Rohn On November 18th, 2016 I married the man that God saved me for, and as a special bonus, I became the mother to a 10-year-old girl and an 8-year-old Labrador, You talk about a life adjustment; this was an axis shift, and my entire world changed. Before meeting my husband, I was a single, fancy-free C-suite executive; whose daily focus was on turning around a struggling beauty company, getting to the gym for my favorite cardio class, shopping on 5th Avenue and planning exciting getaways with my friends and family. I had a life that I loved, but something was missing...My soulmate! I know this sounds corny, but I believed that God would send the one when I was ready and not a minute before. Now there were many nights I would ask God, what is taking you so long to send my boo-thang, but I always kept the faith. I won't bore you with the details of our romance. What I will say is that it felt like an old-school 70's love song, you know like "Let me make love to you" by the O'Jays or Natural Woman by the Queen of Soul, it was wondrous and he still gives me butterflies. But, I had no idea how much work it would take to become a good wife and mother! Confessions from a Real Wife of Jersey I used to give a "Prince" side eye to my married girlfriends when they would complain about their husbands, children, work and not having enough time in the day. I would say to myself, my mom raised four kids, kept her husband happy, our house spotless, dinner (not take out) on the table every night and did it all looking like a supermodel! What I didn't realize is that my mom wasn't a supermodel, but she and all mothers and wives were Super Heroes! This realization hit me after only a few months of my new reality, and while I was overjoyed and completely in love with my husband, daughter, and even my dog child, I was overwhelmed. Surprisingly, the happiest time of my life became the most challenging. I read that moving, job change, getting married, are the life events that cause the most stress, and I was experiencing them all at once. "Toto I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore." Over the past 17 years, I was a proud urbanite. I could walk out of my front door at noon or midnight to find some great food, connect with a diverse group of people at the local coffee shop and check out cool art galleries. It was a life that I took for granted. So when my then boyfriend, invited me to his house for a cookout the only thing I knew about this town was the Fur company (and I love a good fur coat), so I didn't think it was going to be too bad. But as I drove past miles of farmland without seeing a Starbucks, I knew that I was in trouble. When I pulled into the driveway, he walked out with his beautiful boyish grin and said welcome home baby! I giggled nervously, because even though we had only been on a few dates, deep down inside I knew that he was serious. In fact, I had already fallen in love with him too, but could I be happy living in the sleepy suburbs, where the most exciting event taking place was the opening of the Chick-fil-A. So a year and three months after our first date we were married! Like Dorothy, I had to navigate through new adventures, develop new friendships, and overcome difficulties. Some more challenging than others.  "Harpo who dis woman?" Have you ever walked into a room and you immediately knew everyone was starting to talk about you? Well for the first six months after I moved in with my husband, the news in the town was not just about the new Chick-fil-A, but also the new chick in town. Now I completely understand that my husband lived there for ten years and had a different life before me, so we expected some scuttlebutt. But this was on a new level, some of the women treated me worse than Scarlett Ohara after she stole her sister's man. I remember one incident, in particular, my husband had to work late and my daughter asked me to take her to the local yogurt spot for a back to school event, I was a bit reluctant, but I wanted her to have fun with her friends. My commitment as a new mom was not to allow her to suffer for the decisions that we make as adults. So I put on my Michelle Obama "go high" attitude and took her to the event. As expected, most of the mothers pretended that I was the non-English speaking hot nanny unworthy of a hello. After sitting there for the most awkward thirty minutes of my life, I realized that this was not about me or some first wives loyalty club. These women were just afraid of being replaced. Terrified of getting divorced and seeing their Ex happy, their children holding hands with the "new mom" and living a better life without them. I decided I would remain kind and gracious at all times. I would say hello, even if I would get the cold shoulder, I would ease into my new role and not run for the President of the PTA just yet and I would give everyone time to adjust and heal to the new reality. Please check out more of my post on how I navigate being a wife, mom, and a boss!